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2/17/19

20 Cerita Lucu Bahasa Inggris Singkat

iTapuih.com - 20 Cerita Lucu Bahasa Inggris Singkat. Ada banyak cerita lucu bahasa Inggris yang bisa menjadi sarana bagi kita untuk belajar bahasa Inggris. Jenis cerita lucu bahasa Inggris, percakapan lucu bahasa Inggris atau cerita lucu lainnya yang dikenal dengan spoof text memang menyenangkan untuk dibaca. Apalagi kalau sudah sampai sampai bagian lucunya, pasti bikin kita senyam-senyum sendiri bahkan tertawa tertawa terpingkal pingkal.


Membaca cerita lucu bahasa inggris akan membuat lebih bisa menikmati bahasa inggris, berikut ini saya berikan 20 Cerita Lucu Bahasa Inggris Singkat.

I used 28 years to get my PhD in philosophy. It only takes 2 minutes for me to fail my first interview.
Actually, they didn't even interview me! I failed at the reception desk!!
I just couldn't answer her questions....
Who are you?
Where are you come from?
Why are you here?
Damn it!

So a guy at the bar is walking out of the bathroom, a woman comes up to him and says your garage door is open, the man smiles and says did you see my harley? she laughs and says no, all I seen was a minibike and two flat tires.

Silly question
Patient: “Doctor, I feel, I am not able to remember things.”
Doctor: “When did it start?”
Patient: “Hmm, If I knew that why would I ever come to you?”

There is a husband and a wife. The husband dies, and during the funeral, the wife starts to laugh. Everybody starts to ask her why, and she says, "This is the first time that I know where my husband is going."

When a zombie bites Mad Dog, Mad Dog doesn't become a zombie, the zombie, becomes a Mad Dog twin.

One day a magical frog sees a bear chasing after a rabbit for dinner. In an attempt to bring peace to his magical forest, the frog hops up to the two and promises them 3 wishes each if they stop this violence. After both animals agreed, the frog chooses the bear to state his first wish, first. After thinking for a while, the bear says, "I wish for all the bears in this forest to be female except me." Next is the rabbit's turn, "I wish for a motorcycle helmet," he says. The bear laughed, what an idiotic wish to make he thought to himself. The bear then says, "I wish for all the bears in this country to be female except me." The rabbit next says, "I wish for a motorcycle that requires no gas." The bear, almost tearing from laughter, says, "You could have wished for money to get those two things!" He then proceeds to make his final wish, after thinking for a while, he says to the frog, "I wish for all the bears in the world to be female except for me!" He smiles smugly. The rabit then puts on his helmet, hops on his motorcycle, grins to the bear and says, "I wish for this bear to be gay." 

You: Why did the chicken cross the road?
You :To get to the idiots house.
You : Knock, knock
Them: Who's there?
You: The chicken

One day on a plane there were 100 bricks and one fell off. How many are left? 99
What are the three steps to putting a giraffe in the fridge? 1. open the fridge 2. put the giraffe in 3.close the fridge
What are the 4 steps to putting a rhino in the fridge? 1. open the fridge 2. take out the giraffe 3. put the rhino in. 4. close the fridge.
The animals were throwing a party and all the animals but one came. What was it? The rhino
A girl crossed a low bridge over crocodile infested water, but didn't die. Why? The crocodiles were at the party.
When she got to the other side she died though. Why?
A brick fell from a plane and hit her on the head

I was just told that my dog chased someone on a bicycle and bit him.
That's bullshit, my dog can't even ride a bicycle.

A police officer on traffic duty flags down a car.
“Sir, you appear to have 12 penguins in the back of your car.”
“That’s right, officer, I do.”
“Well that’s ridiculous – take them to the zoo straight away.”
“OK officer.”
And the car drives off.
Next day, the same policeman in the same spot sees the same car drive past – with the penguins in the back. He flags him down again.
“I thought I told you to take them to the zoo…”
“Yes, officer, and it was great – today I’m taking them to the cinema.” 

So how do you turn a cat into a dog? My father taught me this trick. You get a can of gasolene, pour it carefully all over the cat, making sure to cover it from head to tail. Then you light a match, and throw it on the cat, and it'll go "woof".

A husband comes home to find his car wrecked, the result of it driving straight into the neighbor's tree. Panicked, he runs to the scene of the accident, and is relieved to find his wife okay, and apologizing profusely to the next door neighbor.
"I just can't understand what happened!" he hears his wife explain.
"How did this happen, honey?" asks the husband.
"Oh, Roger!" the wife cries, hugging her husband. "It was awful! I'm so upset! This accident isn't my fault!"
"And why do you say that, Mrs. Smith?" asks the irate neighbor.
"Because just before I hit your tree, I honked the horn!"

Q: What is the biggest lie in the entire universe?
A: "I have read and agree to the Terms & Conditions."

Q. How does a computer get drunk?
A. It takes screenshots.

I just got fired from my job at the keyboard factory. They told me I wasn't putting in enough shifts.

I know 10 facts about you:
Fact 1: You are reading this.
Fact 2: You can't say the letter 'm' without touching your lips.
Fact 3: You just tried it.
Fact 4: You're smiling.
Fact 6: You're smiling or laughing again.
Fact 7: You didn't notice I missed fact 5.
Fact 8: You just checked it.
Fact 9: You're smiling again.
Fact 10: You like this and you're going to rate or comment. :) 

Teacher: "Anyone who thinks he's stupid may stand up!"
*Nobody stands up*
Teacher: "Im sure there are some stupid students over here!!"
*Little Johnny stands up*
Teacher: "Ohh, Johnny you think you're stupid?"
Little Johnny: "No... I just feel bad that you're standing alone..."

Q: What do you call a cow with 3 legs?
A: tri-tip
Q: What do you call a cow with no legs?
A: Ground Beef
Q: What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
A: Your mom

Boy: *calls 911* Hello? I need your help!
911: Alright, What is it?
Boy: Two girls are fighting over me!
911: So what's your emergency?
Boy: The ugly one is winning.

3 drunk guys enterd a taxi. The taxi driver knew that they were drunk so he started the engine & turned it off again. Then said, "We have reached your destination". The 1st guy gave him money & the 2nd guy said "Thank you". The 3rd guy slapped the driver. The driver was shocked thinking the 3rd drunk knew what he did. But then he asked "What was that for?". The 3rd guy replied, "Control your speed next time, you nearly killed us!" 

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